The biggest difference between a Montessori discipline style and a more traditional method is the lack of punishment, bribes and rewards. Freedom within limits You may have heard the phrase freedom within limits. This means the child does have a lot of freedom, yet there are a few clear limits to keep themselves, others and the environment safe. Unfortunately, our children are not born with an owners manual. Adler was a contemporary and a colleague of Dr. Montessori and they shared many ideas about childrens behavior. Thank you for this post and the videos, very helpful. If this is your first time visiting Living Montessori Now, welcome! Traditional School: Comparison Chart, Montessori Language: Curriculum and Materials for Success, The 24 Best Montessori Books for Parents and Teachers, Montessori Letters: Using Sandpaper Letters & the Moveable Alphabet. Thank you so much for putting this all together. Tantrums or meltdowns are nearly inevitable with children, as they are experiencing big emotions for the first time. * my child wont listen to me. It is important to understand the why to figure out the best way to handle toddler biting. amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "search"; Take the time to evaluate what causes you to feel anxious or angry around your children. When they are melting down, its impossible to rationalise with them. If your child calms down, give them another chance to play with the other kids. Often, Kindergarteners are still developing at the second level, processing what figures of authority expect and connecting both positive and negative actions to consequences. It is important to make children aware that they have the freedom to choose their actions and to begin developing an understanding of the consequences of those actions through conversation. Encourage those activities to which they take naturally rather than engaging them in activities because you think they need to learn something. Tips To Maintain Discipline Through Montessori Approach. These special skills are taught with the Grace and Courtesy lessons. There is no need to be overly dramatic though, simply show you care for the other child too. Timeout is a classic disciplinary action that has students sit quietly, away from toys or classmates, to think about their actions. However, you can use this to observe when your child is showing negative behavior. For instance, if your child is hitting their sibling, you might stop them from playing together for a while and tell the child, I wont let you hurt your sibling.. Make sure your child knows you are listening. Tell them that they can choose which toys to play with or which books to read rather than asking them what they want to do. This is why its important to not show big reactions whenever your child exhibits such behavior, or they may repeat the behavior to get that kind of attention from you. Their little life experience combined with a developing brain can cause them to make the wrong choice every once and a while. As a toddler or preschooler, your child may lack the self-control to express anger peacefully and may naturally lash out, perhaps hitting or biting in frustration. Too often we discipline for the moment, hastily solving the present problem, but possibly creating future ones. We welcome all children regardless of race, religion, or national origin. However, if you observe a family or classroom that uses this approach, you might be surprised to discover that the children respond quite well to Montessori discipline methods. Children learn what to do when someone is unkind or unfair and how to discuss conflicts when they occur. Sometimes, they get overwhelmed with all the things happening around them, and they don't know how to handle this information and emotions. When the child can do things for herself, she will feel confident and in control. The idea is to identify the trigger factors that set your child off and recognize when they are having a tough time. The child would first have to understand that they have a choice in their actions and then have the critical thinking skills to process why they chose to perform that undesirable behavior. Two-Year-Olds hitting can sometimes be a very effective way to handle new emotions. The best of the academic curriculum are useless if the child does not develop inner discipline, integrity, and respect for others and oneself. Montessori discipline methods involve a calmer, quite level of intervention. You can talk about what is bothering them. In reality, Montessori falls in the middle of these two extremes. One of the things that aroused her greatest interest was that order and discipline seemed to be so closely united that they resulted in freedom. 7. Freedom within Limits in Montessori Education (my post), The Beauty of Using Montessori Principles of Freedom and Consistency (my post), A Montessori Approach to Praise (my post), Best Maria Montessori Quotes (my post at Bits of Positivity), How to Manage Interruptions in Your Montessori Classroom or Homeschool (my post), Simple Way to Teach Kids to Stop Interrupting (my post with embedded video), How We Used Gentle Discipline in Our Homeschool (my post). This website is here to provide resources for other moms wanting to use Montessori at home. In this video we explore Montessori in 5 minutes, breaking down the core understandings to help you better apply the principles of Montessori in your home. You know which activities are appropriate for your children and/or the children under your care and are responsible for those children's safety. Instead of seeing the parent or educator as a hindrance to their natural desires, they will begin to see figures of authority as facilitators and gain respect for parents, educators, and other authorities. - NOW AVAILABLE IN AMAZON AND ANY BOOKSELLER -. A Montessori approach to discipline works both in the classroom and at home. By clicking the consent button, you agree to allow the site to use, collect and/or store cookies. (This post contains affiliate links. It is important, though, that you follow through with the next rule when emphasizing natural consequences in this way. When disciplining a preschooler using the Montessori Method, it is time to have conversations using clear, direct language and vocabulary that the child can understand. Once your child has calmed, acknowledge what they were feeling and why. The rules are kept simple, yet they are explored in great detail. It is not something that is automatically present within the child and it can not be taught. Your email address will not be published. Im going to put the ball over here. Montessori education handles discipline by helping children to consider consequences using clear, precise language to validate a child's emotions and ensure that they are free to make their own choices, as long as they are willing to face the consequences of those choices. The idea is to be firm, but never angry. Montessori discipline is not a technical term by any means. Model School Discipline Policy Our School is committed to discipline of children that always dignifies and respects their own true natural inner guidance and self-directed purpose for harmony, order, cooperation and love towards their environment. When these moments do arise, rather than immediately reprimanding or punishing, Montessori discipline methods suggest providing time and space for the child to calm down. International Montessori Society. As adults, it is our responsibility to help children understand the effects of their action. Treat the child with respect so that they will respect you in return by helping them to learn from mistakes rather than scolding or using negative reinforcement. Montessori, however, is only one component in the childs life. Required fields are marked *. This is why, in most cases, parents react impulsively to correct the behavior, such as scolding or spanking. | 20+ At Home Activities, 45+ Montessori Sensorial Activities and Materials, Montessori Practical Life: Activities and Ideas to Build Skills, The 13 Best Montessori Blogs for Tips & Inspiration, Treats children as equals with parents as a guide, Provides opportunities for problem solving, Allows children to process their own emotions, Focuses on internal motivation rather than rewards/bribes, Labels, acknowledges and defines emotions, Provide freedom within limits with clear, consistent boundaries, Allow quiet time for children to calm down and/or process, Practice respectful communication both ways, Demonstrate or assist the child with making amends, Help the child understand the consequences of their actions, Ask the child how those effected might be feeling, They cant exert independence in the ways they wish, They have been rewarded for bad behavior with attention. They are the foundation of the classroom, as they set a tone of respect and kindness. Starting from a young age, have meaningful conversations with children in clear language and using vocabulary that they will understand. Ask yourself: is giving the child time to think about their behavior the most effective way to understand what they have done wrong? And always reinforce and praise behavior when you catch your child being kind and gentle. It is still important to encourage those skills that come naturally to the child, to provide both positive and negative reinforcement, and to normalize viewing failure as an opportunity for learning. Keep calm, be neutral, and dont be judgmental when you ask your child how would you feel if Tommy kicked you?, If they are unable to answer, say how you would feel, such as I would feel scared and sad if you kicked me.. I always say without connection we get very little cooperation. But thats perhaps a post for another day, * a handy checklist here for setting limits Montessori-style 1. Learning about the Montessori Method has been intriguing and fascinating, and I have enjoyed watching the little ones in my life learn and grow from incorporating Montessori elements into our family's lifestyle.Montessori For Today was started to provide answers to my own questions, which will hopefully become a great resource for others to learn about the Montessori Method, Montessori Schools, and how you can incorporate elements of Montessori into your own home and lifestyle. Whether in the home or the classroom it is important to keep in mind the ultimate goal of discipline. Learning about the Montessori Method has been intriguing and fascinating, and I have enjoyed watching the little ones in my life learn and grow from incorporating Montessori elements into our family's lifestyle. Montessori education handles discipline by helping children to consider consequences using clear, precise language to validate a childs emotions and ensure that they are free to make their own choices, as long as they are willing to face the consequences of those choices. Practicing self-regulation. Many of this information triggers emotions. To be consistent with the discipline used in the classroom the parenting style at home should emphasize respect for the childs feelings, choices within acceptable limits, encouragement, conflict resolution, and natural and logical consequences for behavior. Hi, Im Maggie! Specialties: A premier Montessori School providing an excellent academic curriculum in West Covina and Walnut, California. Discover your triggers and then do your best to avoid them in the future. amzn_assoc_title = "Related Products"; At this stage the child has internalized obedience, or we might say, had developed self-discipline where he sees clearly the value of what is being offered to him by authority and rushes to obey. One of the secrets to success in the Montessori classroom is freedom within the limits of very clear ground rules. The thought of giving your kids freedom is a bit scary at any age but especially when they are little. That Stubborn Little Girl! On Discipline - Reflections and Advice by Dr. Maria Montessori The Montessori Approach to Discipline by Mary Conroy and Kitty Williams Bravo Liberty and Discipline in the Montessori Classroom from Montessori for Everyone Explaining to them why certain activities or actions are not allowed helps build their understanding. HITTING MODELS HITTING. So, for children of all ages, it is crucial to give them the maximum freedom possible within their range of choices. I cant let you hit your brother. 5. You can find me onbloglovinandTwitter,too. Teach Grace and Courtesy! It will be available soon. More here. The Montessori approach is a unique methodology of teaching. Understanding why positive discipline is used in a Montessori setting is helpful as you get started, but all the knowledge in the world cant make up for lack of experience. Use the rules above to talk about and validate those emotions while still providing the natural consequences of outbursts of anger or frustration. When the environment provides consistency, nurturing adults and stimulating work, the child can go about his most important work, creating the adult he will become. No need to shame your child or do it as a form of punishment. With that being said, Maria Montessori did record quite a few observations that have led to the development of some general guidelines that most Montessori families and schools use to guide their discipline. Such courses as Redirecting Childrens Behavior, Active Parenting, or STEP, dove tail the Montessori approach to discipline. This is why you need to understand the approach to Montessori discipline, and the right way to handle the situation. Both in the classroom it is crucial to give them the maximum possible!: is giving the child can do things for herself, she will feel confident and in.. This website is here to provide resources for other moms wanting to use, collect and/or store cookies with... Form of punishment, bribes and rewards unfair and how to discuss conflicts when they are little or unfair how... To shame your child is showing negative behavior cause them to make the wrong every! 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